Once
we’re outside, Chloe asks me if I’d like to go for a walk along the
wharf. She seems to be seeing me in a new light, kind of the way she
used to see toys she had forgotten when they were suddenly discovered by
her brother or a friend. The newfound joy and thrill were always the
same for her.
Whatever
her reasons for inviting me here to visit her, or for the walk, I can’t
help feel grateful and think that Nathan is somehow doing magic from up
there. As we walk along the pier, the fresh salt air is calming to my
soul. I have the feeling she’s gathering her courage for something, so I
look at her and ask, “Chloe, would you like to talk about something?”
“What makes you say that?”
“Because I know you, and I can see you’re upset about something.”
I’m
thinking she’s scared of motherhood and the changes ahead, on top of
all the changes I’ve seen so far. Maybe she needs to ask me about the
astrological chart I gave her. But instead she takes a deep, purposeful,
salt-tinged breath. “Mom, did you ever contemplate a separation?”
“Separation?”
I repeat, trying to gather my thoughts—or form a response, for that
matter. She stops walking and looks at me, daring me with her eyes. Her
shoulders drop, signaling she has relaxed, since part of her secret is
out. I almost can hear Magda spell out, “Uranus just walked in,”
referring to the planet that represents sudden and unexpected changes.
Ruler of originality and freedom.
“Our
marriage wasn’t perfect, Chloe. It had its ups and downs, like many
marriages do.” She looks irritated as I walk to a bench and signal for
her to join me. I can sense this isn’t the answer she was looking for,
nor for that matter, is what I’m about to say next. “But to answer your
question, no, I never considered it. We had an unspoken understanding
that we could fight, but we’d always find a loving way to understand
each other after the fireworks of anger had left.”
She looks disappointed. “I just wish Brian understood me.”
I take her fingers, which are resting on her leg, and give them a squeeze as I ask, “How long have you felt like this?”
She
looks at the sea in front of her and begins to whisper, as if talking
to the wind. “For some time now, I’ve had the feeling that he’s rushing
through life, from the office to the house, and everything in between is
a task on his to-do list, and that includes me.” I stroke her hand
gently to show my support while she continues to talk. “I tried not to
focus on it, to find things to do together, even to get the house to
seem more comfortable. But he remained the same, and I…I’m not.”
“Honey,
when you two got married three years ago, you both seemed like that.
Very serious about life, yourselves, and very career driven.”
A
tear slowly glides down her cheek, and I want to reach out and wipe it,
but I contain myself and only look at the ocean as I speak. “I can see
how changed you are,” I say. “This must be daunting and challenging for
your husband, as you’re changing before his eyes and he probably has no
clue to what to do.” Then I make myself say what I might regret, but I
have to know. “What opened you up? Is there someone else?”
The
question is out. When she looks at me, her eyes show a tiny bit of
guilt, and she remains silent. So I say, “Honey, I know I’m not your
first option for talking, but I’m here and I love you.” I feel joy at
having the opportunity to say what so many times I couldn’t, but her
reaction startles me. She throws herself at me, rests her head on my
shoulder, and cries openly.
“I…I…”
I
make her stop talking as I stroke her hair and say, “It’s OK, it’s OK.
Whatever it is, it’ll be OK.” My heart is racing, and I’m thinking the
unthinkable. My daughter, my pregnant daughter, might be having an affair.
Can anything good follow the best thing that ever happened to you?
Amelia
Weiss loved her husband of thirty-five years very much, but now he’s
left her a widow. Without him, she is unable to work in her sculpture
studio without crying. She no longer has a bridge to her estranged
daughter. And she can’t seem to keep her mind in the present.
But
when her daughter reaches out asking for her help and her agent
threatens a lawsuit if Amelia doesn’t deliver for an upcoming exhibit,
she’s forced to make a choice. Will she reengage with her life and the
people in it—allowing room for things to be different than they were
before? Or, will she remain stuck in the past, choosing her memories
over real-life relationships?
Thrust fully into the present, Amelia stumbles into a surprising journey of self-discovery.
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Genre – Contemporary Fiction, Literary Fiction, Women’s Fiction
Rating – PG-13
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